How to Overcome the Crushing Weight of Perfectionism

‘I was so close.’ ‘Oh my gosh, I messed up.’ ‘I need to start over.’ Do you feel like this whenever you start a new piece? Or even feel like this on a piece that you have been working on for weeks? It’s very easy to put all the blame on yourself and get frustrated when things just don’t go your way. You want to be the best; however, “Le mieux est l’ennemi du bien,” which means, “The best is the enemy of good,” or, in other words, perfect is the enemy of progress. As a chronic overthinker and perfectionist myself, here are a few tips that I use to make progress.

Adding a Time Limit

Any small mistake feels like a big issue. You start over and over, trying to push past a certain section, but you go nowhere. It almost feels like it takes forever to get through a single sheet of music. Put a 5-minute timer on your phone, laptop, or tablet to get through the song. With such a small amount of time, there won’t be enough time to go back to the beginning. It’s basically like poking a hole in a dam to let the water out, causing you to focus less on what you’re stuck on and more on the entire song.

Playing Loud

Anger fuels an unhealthy mindset, causing a ton of doubt, which in turn makes you play worse. How do you get all of that out? Well, I’d say play as loud as possible. Scream out the lyrics, press hard on those keys, or pluck the strings with (almost) maximum strength. Letting it all out can be therapeutic. This will help relieve stress and can calm you down after a while. I do suggest you do this in either a room where no one can hear you or when there aren’t a lot of people at your house. For those who can hear you, be sure to give them a heads up.

Having Bite-Sized Pieces

There is no way to eat a whole cake in one sitting. I know because I have tried. Likewise, you shouldn’t be playing from beginning to end when you’re just starting. Slicing it into smaller sections will make it more digestible. Try cutting the song into several parts that contain two to three measures. Start with a part that you are good at before moving to the ones you struggle with. Small, bite-sized pieces are harder to choke on than your own expectations.

Take a Break

You might be thinking, “I practiced this for so long, why am I still not getting it?” It might be time to take a break. Just like a fresh pair of eyes helps you notice the finer details, a fresh pair of ears can also help you hear all the improvements you’ve made so far. Give yourself a set amount of time away from the piece. This can be as long as a day or as short as a couple of minutes. Being well rested also helps rejuvenate your mood, leading to fewer mistakes when playing.

Using a couple of these steps can help you make progress and become less fixated on being perfect. Sure, there will be times when moving forward feels like the end of the world. However, “If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly,” so just keep practicing. Because getting through one step at a time is better than going nowhere fast.

Ashley Beaverson, B.A., Administrative Assistant